Second-guessing

More like seventh-guessing. Or eleventh-guessing. You'd think that after having gone through the gauntlet of parenting a newborn once already, I'd have become a tad more self-assured, that some of the mysteries of the little life rocking away in her swing beside me would become a little less mysterious. Not so! No indeed, the questions, the confusion, the constant state of uncertainty is still very much the reality of life with a two-week old, I'm afraid. It is a new mother's constant companion, boon and bane.

Take, for example, my little one's near-constant issues with gas pains. She wriggles, writhes, grunts, and in the end, shrieks, on repeat. After a week of relatively easy babyhood, during which she happily ate, slept, and pooped - this has become our reality for the last week or so. Enter the guessing game. Is she not getting enough? Is she getting too much? Do I have overactive letdown? Do I have oversupply? Is her latch not correct? Is she lactose intolerant? Should I block feed? Should I change breast-feeding positions? Am I burping her wrong, or not enough? Is it the formula? The bottle? Does she have reflux? Should I be pumping more, less? What colour is her poop, what consistency? Should she be doing it more, less? Should I elevate her crib? Should I stop feeding on demand and feed more but less often? Less but more often? Should I cut out the formula completely, or stop breast-feeding completely? Do an elimination diet? But what? Dairy? Caffeine? Gassy vegetables? Alcohol? Um. How am I to survive eliminating these things??? Yikes.

Doctor google doesn't help much either. There is such an overabundance of information on-line and elsewhere now. Again, the bane and blessing of new moms. Definitely, a blessing at times, when you're looking for some answers. At the same time, there are generally at least two dozen "answers" to your questions, with varying degrees of usefulness, subjectivity, and judgement. Perhaps it's time for a google-free week, and a time of depending only on my mommy instinct for a bit. I'm not sure if I could do it. All I want is for Ada to be happy and healthy and for all of us to get some sleep!